LEAPING SCHNAUZER

Brian McLaren and the Episcopal Church

2009-07-21T11:12:00.003-04:00

I'm sitting in my office trying to catch up from being away on vacation for the last two weeks and so have been trying to read up on what has been happening at General Convention (the ultimate governing body of the Episcopal Church). Apparently, lots has been happening and I thought this was going to be a quiet year--seems I was wrong. For starts, it appears that we've made some definitive steps towards endorsing same-sex blessings (marriages where possible) and towards allowing gay bishops to be consecrated. While these things please me, I also find myself wondering where that will take us in regards to our relationship with the rest of the Communion and with those who are currently sitting in our pews who may not be so pleased. I often preach that as Christians, we aren't called to be right, but to be faithful; meaning that I see our mission to be the embodiment and living out the reconciliation that Christ exemplified for and offers to, us. I like emphasizing faithfulness because I feel it nuances the difficulties that come in life and in the choices we make. It hints that there may be a price to pay for our being faithful--as there was for Christ. It may be that we do pay a great price for making these choices. In our doing what we feel is right, we may fail to be faithful to our brothers and sisters who feel we aren't and so fall short of reconciliation on this end. Obviously, a less than perfect solution. Yet in acting as we have, we retain our integrity as people of faith and our identity as such. In spite of what some (indeed many) may say, I feel the full inclusion of the GLBT community is a faithful Christian response to questions of human sexuality. And it certainly will be seen as such by the individuals, couples and families who find themselves within this community.

And yet it isn't enough.

No, I'm not advocating for a more progressive agenda. I'm pressing for a more evangelical agenda. Enter Brian McLaren. Anglicans love Brian McLaren, and he us. But I'm not sure we're listening just yet. Especially the Episcopalians. He spoke twice at General Convention, with one of those talks being a sermon he offered last Thursday. In it he talked about how the E word (Evangelism) should no longer be a dirty word for the Episcopal Church. Because, lets face it, it is. And in truth that word has lots of baggage. But the way McLaren defined it should give us pause and help us reconsider what it means to be evangelical:

And we can start with today’s reading from 2 Corinthians. There we see evangelism as
our call to demonstrate and proclaim a new creation in Christ. We see our call to live and
invite others into a new way of life. We see evangelism as recruiting early adopters to be
part of a radical new beginning for the human race – which Paul calls the new creation in
Christ.

This world and its empires are living by an old script, Paul would say. Politics of
domination and exploitation, economies of consumption, sociologies of exclusion and
prejudice, and psychologies of shame and self-justification all flow from the old
destructive narrative that is passing away. The crucifixion and resurrection of Christ
meant for Paul, among many other things, that it is time for a new politics of service and
the common good, for new economies of sustainability and regeneration, for new
sociologies of reconciliation and love, and for new psychologies rooted in grace and faith
. . . in short, in Christ, all things are made new, and evangelism means recruiting and
training people to defect from the old order and throw themselves wholeheartedly into the
new way.

Wow. I think this is something we could all get behind. Especially in the midst of our institutional crisis. And in terms of such a crisis, he goes on to point out that in order to save our institution, we might have to be willing to let go of it. To let it change. Because if we don't-if we try to save the institution we will in fact lose it. If this is the first you've heard that the Episcopal church, like many churches, is struggling--welcome.

So, for all my fellow Episcopalians, and to myself, I ask: what are we willing to give up? What can we let go of? As I have been for the last two years learning to dive into the world of evangelism, these are the questions I have kept asking as it was becoming more and more apparent to me that people aren't interested in being invited to something. I think they are more interested in being invited into something. Something dynamic and alive and not into a particular denomination. Our institution is a tool, it is not the end. I am ok with this--but it took some time. While we boldly declare that same-sex couples can have full inclusion in our church, we dare not invite someone to church, or make our worship more inclusive, or even share our faith with someone outside of the church because that might be seen as scary, dirty, fundy, evangelism. It is the very same faithfulness that we exemplify in our inclusivity, in our support of the MDG's and in our service that is required in evangelism, but we get in the way of it. I love the Episcopal church for all that it is and all that it loves. I have no intention of leaving it. Yet I am willing to let go and be rid of anything that stands in the way of our being a faithful and missional church. We have so much to offer, so much that is life-giving and wonderful. Let's take advantage of all of that and use it to its full potential and become evangelists and in doing so become better disciples ourselves.

Worship space

2009-06-18T12:59:00.004-04:00

I guess in a kind of follow-up to my last post, I would offer up a photo of our May worship. New screen and projector and new candles from our "guest" bassist Jeremy. Who is moving to Kalamazoo! Wonderful soul who always worked in the evenings and so could never make a service--until he lost his job after the restaurant closed. We'll miss you!
Anyway, we had lovely music and readings this evening with a blend of Taize songs and praise music. Ruthy, who plays keyboard and Steve, on violin, were incredible with their skill in leading us and helped create an environment of reverence and joy. And with our singing we also incorporated visuals with icons being projected on the screen, images used for our prayers, and quiet space for those so moved to share witness to God in their lives and in the city we worship. It was fabulous. And then of course we had dinner. Also fabulous--for tuna salad.

I love how we worship, and I love that we all have a hand in making it happen. Recently, we gathered at my place to discuss the future of our taize worship and us. I was blessed to see that there is energy moving amongst us to expand, maybe not necessarily into an every-week-taize-service, but adding on bible study to our activities, other things we called "Community-building Adventures" and possibly a simple Sunday evening thing. But, these things don't just exist as plug-in points for others; they are also things that sustain us. As a group, we all are committed to helping out each other and offering support--creating a community where, as I told one young man the other day, one can find trustworthy people who are working at being the good news in Saginaw. These are not easy things, particularly in a place like Saginaw, MI. A broken city in a broken state. But, for now, our little worship space is a place of beauty and peace; something different and hopefully, something also a little familiar.

Person of Peace--Bob.

2009-06-02T16:38:00.003-04:00

For anyone who's new to an area, particularly someone who is looking to start a faith community, it is important to meet an individual who can connect you to the greater community--to others. This is how you start to fit it and are allowed to begin forging new relationships. This person, by bringing you in closer, tells others that there is something trustworthy about you, that you're ok and that basically you don't have the social equivalent of the plague. For me, that person was Bob Maul. I had been in the Tri-Cities for maybe a month or two and knew next to no one. So, on a day I was having coffee with the one guy I did know, I was introduced to Bob, and suddenly found myself a few days later sitting in a scull learning how to row. What?! As I would come to find out, I was not the first person to find themselves deeply involved in a Bob-project.

But, I told Bob who I was and what I did and he was supportive from the word go. And as I worked to be a part of the Lawn Chair Film Festival, the Rowing Club and Christmas caroling, I got to know more and more people. And I started to become something of a part of that Saginaw community. And as that happened, began to form a small community with some of those individuals I met through Bob. And as our, as yet, nameless community got more organized and started worship, he gave us space under the loft that he and his wife Arlene shared. Bob was, for me, my person of peace; and when he passed last month, I had the honor of co-celebrating his funeral. And after seeing what must have been close to 500 people piling into the church, I realized that he was a person of peace to many more than just me.

So, from my corner of the world, this is my little thank-you to Robert Maul. And I know that I join many in missing him.

I've got Jesus on my side--really!

2009-05-11T16:02:00.002-04:00

So, I still hang out in the coffee shop that I first walked into when I started this work. Of course I do. And I still converse with many of the people I first met when I moved here almost two years ago. One of these people is the barista who I've been trying to get to come to our Taize services for forever now. And each time I ask, she turns me down. So it goes. However, these days instead of her teasing me, I get to tease her a little bit.

Now, I asked her if I could blog about this and she said yes, so before I go further know that I have informed consent.

This young woman has many beautiful tattoos and I'm always admiring them, and seeing the new ones she's getting in addition to the hair color and piercings. She's fun. And now, she is getting a very large, very colorful tattoo of a stained glass image of Jesus on her side. And according to her, it's hurting like hell. So of course I could absolutely NOT resist jabbing her a bit. I mean, there ARE easier ways to have Jesus. Our little monthly services are humble and quiet; and we don't jab anyone with tiny little needles. We also have food when we are done--when was the last time a tattoo shop gave you a pancake for your trouble? I mean, really! Yet, the 2-dimensional Jesus is still more appealing than the Jesus matrix--the Jesus we find in community. Why is this? Why should this be? Maybe it is because the Jesus in the picture, drilled into her flesh, is somehow more real than the Jesus in the world. For her anyway.

I'm sure I'm going to love her new ink and I can't wait to see it finished, but I also can't help but wonder why the real Jesus sometimes struggles to break through. And not just for her, but for lots of people with the tattoo Jesus. And this is me not wondering just how it is that Jesus has failed, he hasn't, but rather how has the church failed to connect. So, how do we re-connect? The million dollar question, right? But I also believe that it is better to ask this question than to assume people are just going to show up--like they used to fifty years ago. Because they aren't. And the blessing in this is that we cannot, or can no longer, take our faith for granted. Not to say that we are faithful so that we still have church as its always been, but so we can have healing, reconciling communities who in their discipleship invite others to also be disciples. That way, even with a tattoo of Christ in your ribcage, it would still be possible for one to say that truly one had Christ on one's side. Because in fact, one would-- in all those others also walking the journey of faith.

Just my musings for the week....

Dear God, it's been a year!

2009-05-04T14:58:00.002-04:00

Shameful on my part, yes, but I really let the blog thing go for a number of reasons; none of which may be great, but they're my reasons. So there. I thought I would reopen my blogging life with a sermon post. I've never done anything like this before, but thought it might be a good idea and certainly an interesting way to get feedback. So, to kick this blog back off, I'm offering my Good Shepherd Sunday sermon I preached yesterday.
The texts are:

Acts 4:5-12
Psalm 23
1 John 3:16-24
John 10:11-18

The readings for this Good Shepherd Sunday are full of images of compassion, giving, and caretaking aren’t they? And love, there is such a powerful theme of love that I felt myself responding to the texts by having that song by the Beatles pop into my head: “All you need is love”, which immediately made me then think of a campfire scene where men and women with dreadlocked hair sat around the fire signing songs, wearing hemp clothing and smelling like petuly. It was kind of this weird picture from the 60’s where you had all kinds of people throwing off the constraints of traditional society and embracing this bohemian life of carefree love and I just had them seated around a campfire with Greatful Dead t-shirts on and no shoes. Such is the image one gets who wasn’t actually around when all of this was taking place. So, I apologize for my stereotyping and for doing a poor job at that. However, it did get me wondering about what it meant to love. Because, I do feel that all we need is love. However, in the same breath I will also point out that more is necessary. But then, what more? What is more than love? Especially the kind of love we have read about today?
I mean, there are so many kinds of love that have to do with different parts of our lives—our families, pets, foods, lovers, friends, activities and so on. English is pretty paultry when it comes to being able to nuance the different loves—truly, we only have one word whereas other languages have several. We have to figure it out what kind of love someone is talking about by the context of the conversation. Its easy to say we love taco’s but any sane person would be using the word “love” in a somewhat different way than they would when talking about a spouse or child. Still, when I had this song playing in my head, I wasn’t necessarily thinking about all the different possibilities for the word “love” but rather found myself thinking about the emotional reactions we associate with that word through my own gut reaction. Sort of that warm fuzzy feeling. Which is where I saw the problem.
Now, I wonder if we don’t see love as being more of a noun as opposed to seeing it as a verb? Put another way, is love something we have, as in an emotion, or is it something we do, as in our actions? I think most of us would say, “both” and that would be correct. Because it is. But, regardless, I feel like there is a tendency for us to emphasize the emotional, I-have-a-good-feeling, part. It certainly is marketed to us that way: You will love the new burger at Burger King because it has such great taste and makes us feel good, or a particular new car because it smells nice and makes us feel good; sitcom’s have people falling “in love” all the time, which usually shows us a couple of people in these dewy emotional states and feeling really good which makes us feel good and we call it love. For me, the bottom line seems to be that in our collective understanding of love, we far too often associate it with a kind of emotional euphoria-- which happens and is a good thing, but it is not long lasting nor is it capable of being present in all kinds of situations. When I think of love, I often think of it in this way, or even at times offhandedly, when I talk about how much I love Japanese food. But love is more—always more.
So, I think it is time for us to start thinking of love as also being a verb, a thing we enact. A thing we can do even when our emotions may not quite be there. When we may not be feeling a drop of loving toward the person to whom we are giving love. And thank God for that, for when was the last time any of us were really able to control how we responded emotionally to something? Probably not ever. And it isn’t something we can, nor should do; however, we can act. And the love that we are being invited into in our scriptures today is love found in service to one another. In this way, loving another person doesn’t require that we necessarily feel loving toward him or her, but that we act out of service, compassion, kindness, hope, and love. To all, even to those who have harmed us. And the blessing here is that in loving each other in this way, our love can be expressed, yet does so in a way that doesn’t deny ourselves and any of our own pain, hurt, injustice, fear, or anger that this other may have caused in us. Case in point, there is a movie, the Scarlet in the Black telling the true story of a priest who during WWII smuggled and housed Jews in and out of Rome. At the end, saving over two thousand Jews. At the same time, there was a German officer, the Commandant, who suspected that this priest was doing this, but couldn’t prove it and never did. However, when the war ended, this officer and his family were in danger of execution. The officer came to this priest and requested he take his family to safety. The priest refused. However, at the end of this story, this priest does indeed save this man’s family and in doing so, exemplifies a love that doesn’t deny horror or wrongdoing, but does not also demand blood for blood. That doesn’t require retribution, that doesn’t see that this man ought to be punished by losing his own family like the families he himself destroyed. It is the kind of love that through the lying down of life for others allows space for healing and for transformation. It does not perpetuate the same violence, the same hatred and the same anger but arrives at a moment and responds—differently.
Love should be lived out of us, be breathed out of us, poured out of us for others and in doing so, will then make its way back into us changing our hearts so that both our hearts and minds are truly in synch with each other and we begin to become whole ourselves. This is how healing happens. By loving others, we will know love ourselves. And we see this model of wholeness and love, this Good Shepherd, before us in Christ, the one who inside and out loves us from his very core to our own. Who knows us and sees us for all that can make us very unloveable and who yet still loves in the laying down of his own life—the giving of himself to us in body mind and spirit, in what essentially is the sharing of life and all that makes life both wonderful and horrible. There is an Icon writer of contemporary Icons, Robert Lentz who paints images of traditional saints as well as contemporary people and concepts. He has done an image of the Good Shepherd, and instead using a lamb or sheep, he paints this Christ with his arm around what he describes as a smelly, lustful, scary, old billy goat. And it fits the description, it looks like it could eat the page it has been painted onto. Yet this goat represents those who are truly difficult to love, and if you ask me that would cover pretty much all of us as some time or another, but yet here it is in the arms of the Good Shepherd--being saved.
We will not find our life in hatred or rightness or even in our self-protection. We will find our life before us as it is passed over to someone else and changed before our very eyes. And in doing this we will not be the same, but begin to see just how we fit into this life, this flock Christ has claimed as his own and begin to love as he has loved us. Love and life are inextricably linked in this fold of Christ’s. The passage before our Gospel reading today is those words of hope Christ speaks: that he came to give us life and life abundant. We cannot first do this without love, not a carefree kind of emotional high, but a deliberate, meaningful love that we practice with each other and in doing so, grow into. Our model is our Good Shepherd who guides us into this practice that makes space for all to enter the fold and not just those we find easy to love. At the end of our days we will all lay down our lives, but for those who have loved, who have served the flock and cared for Christ’s sheep, they will know what it has meant to lay down their lives so as to then pick them up again and have life abundantly and fully, finding themselves in each other. This is the challenge that is ever before us, and yet it is one that has been met by the Saviour. In our own lives, let us meet this challenge and embrace love as practice and as life. Amen.

Sheesh!

2008-06-23T09:50:00.000-04:00

Ok, almost out of the airport! Anyway, as I was trying to write yesterday, there were all these amazing different communities gathered not just to discuss, but to celebrate their faith as it is lived out in their very common, yet not-so-common life together.

The topic of the gathering was not just community, but faith lived out in every aspect on one's life and for these people, that meant inclusivity' identification with the poor, poverty, action, love and worship. It was clear that not everyone was coming from the same background and certainly not everyone was coming from the same sort of "doctrine". But what they did have in common was a desire to follow Christ so as not to be Christians, but to be disciples.

This was a good look at what I might call a kind of emerging neo-monasticism. The days were structured around morning worship which usually involved a phone call to someone like tony camplo or Brian mcclaren (rock stars of the faith) followed by learning sessions held in the morning. My flight is about to board so ill follow up on this later!
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Post PAPA fest

2008-06-23T09:37:00.000-04:00

Well, here I am stuck in Chicago, about to fly out to get stuck in Detroit because the weather has been spotty and my flight has been delayed. I am pooped, but feel satisfied after having experienced this wonderful converging of communities.

As I think I alluded to before, I had no idea what to expect. I had a vague idea what it was about but that was kinda along the lines of: oh, there is this festival of people who come together to create community and they talk about interesting things like prayer and converting your diesel engine over to a vegetable oil burning engine. Yeah, pretty vague but I was intrigued. So I went along and discovered a network of intentional christian communities some of which have been around since the 1940,s while others have only been in existence for a few years.
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This is a test

2008-06-19T07:53:00.000-04:00

So, I thought I would try out mobile blogging while I am away the next week and a half. Let's see how it goes!
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Set up

2008-06-19T07:44:00.000-04:00

Testing mobile blogging
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Church anyone?

2008-05-30T16:19:00.006-04:00

So, we had another Taize service and this time potluck to follow. So far, this thing is going well and it has really been a beautiful service each time. We are getting this thing streamlined and we want to keep food a part of it. In fact, partly due to the holiday weekend preceding everything we had a lot of food to share which pleased me greatly because I had no idea what was going to show up on the table.
Because it is so lovely, I can see this taize service working as a attractive invitation to people to stop by and check us out. Still, is it church? Everyone there seems to understand it as a church service, but how is it connecting with them--particularly since we've only done two of these things. The last thing I want to see is another pretty church service unattached to anything in the outside world. We need more, but what and how to introduce it? Bible study as it was is over, and that's ok--we aren't supposed to be "bible study;" we are supposed to be "church" but I get the sense that church still means the institution for many people. As my friend Chad told me, this sort of thing is easier to do with non-Christians than with those who have grown up in the church. I have to say that in my limited experience, I have to agree. The one individual I have been working with who comes from no church background whatsoever has really embraced this somewhat emergent model of church. He immediately thinks "outside of the box" because he was never in a box to begin with.
And I do think that much of this actually requires us to think outside of all boxes. Otherwise, how are we owing our faith, how our we living out our baptisms? Everyone I talk to has some opinion as to what is wrong with the church, but they don't seem to have much of an imagination when it comes to what might be a new way of envisioning church. I repeatedly tell people that it is not about being right, but rather it is about being faithful. So much of what I come across when it comes to people's church baggage has to do with doctrine, or dogma as they usually put it. But while they can articulate this displeasures they have no language for doing things otherwise (perhaps its because its easy to bitch?) And I think it is more simple than they believe.
James Alison has put it well and put it simply when he writes: the really hard work in Christian theological discourse lies in the ecclesiological sphere: creating Church with those who we don't like. Or, to put it another way; as a Catholic, the only way I could conceivably be right in what is recognizably a new theological and moral position is if I show that being right is nothing to do with me, and how it includes an account of how we have all been wrong together in which I too am on the side of those with whom I disagree as someone undergoing a change of heart along with them.
We aren't "right;" we are striving for something beyond ourselves (like, God)--that is what it means to be church. This is what I'm trying to get across to people.

Another thought...

2008-05-15T11:15:00.002-04:00

With the Taize, this little group seems to be going through some changes. What we've been doing so far we've been referring to as bible study and we've been meeting for a while now and we've seen various people come and go. Over the last several months we have been simply getting together for dinner and discussion of the bible. Now, though we are still tiny (very tiny) I think we are ready to be something a bit more and I think we have come to a place to see ourselves as a kind of community. Bible study is over (at least as it has been happening) and we have decided to stop calling it "bible study." While a name for the group is a little beyond us right now, we may be at the beginning of moving in a specific direction, and a different kind of energy may be emerging.

I can't really say where we are heading yet, how long it will take, and what it will look like in the end. I have some ideas of where I'd like it to go, but it isn't all up to me either. But, it is going somewhere and I'm excited to see where exactly. As one person said, "We've birthed this baby, now lets christen it."

Sounds good to me.

One More Taize Picture

2008-05-15T11:12:00.003-04:00

Steve with violin in the dark. Not the best picture, but kinda fun.

Taize

2008-05-15T10:23:00.006-04:00

Well, at the end of April we had our first Taize worship experience and it was lovely. We again used the empty storefront on Hamilton Street and had about 12 people attend. We did this at 9:30 at night and lit the place up with candles. Lots of candles. We had a small altar set up against the wall and inserted Holy Communion in the middle of the service. For those of you who aren't familiar with Taize, check it outhere.

Basically, this is a contemplative prayer service that is sung. You sing each prayer slowly and you repeat them in order to center, to open yourself up to an experience of God. We sung a few prayers, had a reading from the gospel, a sung psalm and then communion--and the prayers here were also sung. We had some silence and continued singing with the Lord's prayer. Steve, our musician, lead us with his violin and did a marvelous Job. We, as a group, had never sung together and I didn't know everyone in the room even. We did a wonderful job so, we're going to do it again.

Here's a picture of Julie, who is now off in Vietnam serving the world, lighting the candles.

Passover

2008-04-17T13:35:00.002-04:00

Now, I don't come from any kind of Jewish background and have very little experience with the Jewish holidays, but one of our bible study members does and so he and his partner are graciously opening up their home this coming Saturday to host a passover Seder. From what Steve says we are going to be spending some time participating in the meal as he figures it will run about 2-3 hours and this is the short version. Those I have spoken to from the group seem eager to be there; I know I am.

One of the things I and others have been keen to include in the realm of "group" activities are monthly meals. This desire, I believe, is part of what has lead us to be gathering for Passover. It is also what will hopefully bring us together next month for a meal during which we will participate in the Eucharist. I mention all this about the Saginaw group because it seems we are on the edge of some kind of change. I'm having a difficult time articulating that, but it seems that now we can perhaps move a little beyond being simply a bible study. Particularly since worship is being introduced there seems to be another dynamic making its way into the group that while not eliminating "bible study" will change it. However, the group itself will be undergoing a fairly large change in the near future when several of the college students who have been helping to form a core to the community graduate and leave the area. What we will look like after that, I cannot say. I only know that it seem the time has come for us to begin seriously talking about who we are, what we believe, and where we think we are going in Christ.

My challenge is that I have always take "church" for granted. In this setting that is impossible and it is always a new thing that we are creating. And for me, striking that balance between my helping it being created and me creating it is tricky. I don't want to impose too much structure, yet too little and what are we doing? Right? I think that's why right now things feel like they are shifting, more structure is being added, but I also think I'm not the only one adding it. So, perhaps for now, we are right where we should be. Even if I can't quite get my head around it.

Oh Lord, let it be so.

Stations 2

2008-03-28T11:40:00.002-04:00

Ok, here is the second half of the meditation. It kinda cuts off abruptly, but with a ten min. cap, this is what happens.
In addition to watching, we also had people reading the story of the Way of the Cross (taken from the Book of Occasional Services) as well as saying the prayers that appeared on the screen (following the leader, response format). This helped bring the two dimensional movie into the three dimensional world. Anyway, we kept it really basic and there seemed to be a desire to build on it for next year.

I really think that we will be doing more with the visual/audio world as we get better at it. So, here is the second half of our Stations:

Ok, Wow. So, a lot has happened over the last few months

2008-03-28T10:02:00.002-04:00

So, finally I'm back. Its been a couple of crazy months--I got ordained, Lent, and then finally Easter! There is sooooo much that I am going to be catching up on today.... Anyway, we've been busy. Our little bible study continues to meet, I think to grow, and to evolve. We had our first sort of worship experience. A couple of the guys and I put together an Imovie of the stations of the cross. Thanks to Jim Best for sending me these amazing photos of the stations! What we did is basically put together an elaborate slide show of pictures depicting the stations (traditional stations of Jesus and his mother, Simon and so on) and positioned them along side more contemporary photos (provided by the MaryKnoll Brothers and my digital camera). We laid over tracks from the movie "The Hours" and made a kind of meditation using a sound system and a projector. Really basic and we had a small gathering for it. I wasn't even sure we'd be able to do this so I didn't even start putting things up until the week we did this (Holy Week).

Since I only know how to upload this to youtube, and since you can only upload so much at a time on youtube, here is the first half of our stations:

The quality is not so fab. here and it did come out much better in real life. But this will give you an idea of what we did. I'll also upload the other half of the meditation as soon as I create it. I think this went well for us, and we had a wonderful bible study last night with great conversation, looking ahead and enthusiasm. I hope we can maintain this energy! We are looking ahead to going to and having our own Taize service as well as getting together for a Passover meal next month. So, the Saginaw groups is, at this moment, going well.

Now, Midland: who wants to try stuff like this here?

Mars in Retrograde

2008-02-01T18:54:00.000-05:00

Wow, its February already and its been a month since I last blogged--goodness! January was an interesting and rather long month. For my part, I've been working on keeping bible study strong and getting ready for my ordination; all of which is a lot to think about and I've been full of various feelings. I'm definately looking forward to my ordination, and I've invited many of the people I've met over the last few months to share that day with me--hopefully you'll all come! At the same time, I've been working on keeping bible study consistent, interesting, and inclusive in order to work on building community. Some days I feel really good about how things are going, other days not so much. January in particular was a roller coster of "oh, this is never going to work," to "ok, I think we are headed somewhere." One of the things we did was move our meeting location from the Magic Bean coffeeshop, to the Mixx bar in old town. I think we're going to enjoy the bar better than the coffee shop; the ambiance is certainly more cozy and those who couldn't come to the coffee shop, are able to come to the bar (in other words, the bartender's schedule changed so we moved to help accomodate it.) So far, so good and we had a better number this week than last (not that its about numbers...)
Another thing we've been working on is getting involved. All of our bible study people are involved someway in the community and I think that's fabulous. At the same time, I'd like to unify our efforts more and thus focus our energy on one particular need. One of our members in particular has been identifying needs in the downtown Saginaw area and has been very good about showing us these areas. He grew up in the Tri-cities, and I have learned a lot from him about what's up and what's down in Saginaw. Its pretty basic right now but even those efforts, I discovered, are greatly appreciated. So, I and a few other people are going to be in Saginaw tomorrow pulling usable stuff out of homes that are scheduled to be demolished. In this way, perfectly good building material can be reused. To be honest, I was a bit skeptical at first, but then saw that this was indeed something good, yea, necessary for the improvement of the neighborhood. It is a simple task really, but one around which energy can be put and one where we can also see the fruit of our labors.
So what does this have to do with Mars? I chose the title Mars in Retrograde after hearing it commented on by one of our bible study people. I really don't know what it means, but she said that anytime something significant happened in her life, Mars always seemed to be in retrograde (so, obviously it has something to do with Astrology). After hearing her talk about it like this, I thought I'd use it to point out that small things are indeed happening within this little group. I think significant things are beginning to happen and there seems to be a kind of energy emerging (dare I use that word?). I pray that it is the Spirit starting to move, because I'm dying to see where she takes us.

Bible Study Number 2

2008-01-02T22:38:00.000-05:00

Whooo hooo! Had another bible study. Thank you all for coming--it's always lovely to see you! Really. No, seriously, it is. You see, (and I don't know if any of you who actually came might be reading this but,) everytime we get together, we are forming a kind of community. We are coming together to participate in something bigger than ourselves and in doing so, make ourselves available to be changed as well as to faciliate change around us. We were talking tonight about how so many people talk about doing things, but never actually get around to doing them. We mentioned that many people don't feel that they have the power to do anything and so succumb to apathy. Well, I'm here to point out that the simple act of coming together for something as like a bible study is a first step to avoiding this type of lethargy. Believe it or not, Christianity, a faith community, is not about avoiding certain kinds of behavior, but is about taking on certain kinds of missions. Nor is it about getting people to believe in the same things as you. Instead, community in the Christian faith is about action; it is being present to the world by being in the world and doing so as an empowered individual serving in an empowered community. When we follow in the way of Christ, when we become disciples of his, we are taking on his work, his mission to be the light to the world. To each other.
It starts with the simplest of committments. Can you not see how powerful you are?

Facebook Group: I'm religious not spiritual....wha?

2007-12-20T15:52:00.000-05:00

So, on facebook I've been invited by a friend of mine to join the group "I'm Religious, Not Spiritual." Intrigued, I went further to see what this particular group was about and discovered that many friends of mine are already in it--meaning that a fair bit of clergy were represented as well as some other young religious types. At first I thought it might be a sort of tongue-in-cheek group identity--at least I was hoping. It seems, however, that it really is a group responding to that oft-heard response of many non-church-goers to clergy: "Oh, I'm spiritual, not religious!" Meaning that while the individual may not go to church, it doesn't preclude him or her having a faith life and/or experience of God.

Admittedly, I once viewed this answer as the moral equivalent of Bill Clinton's 1992 rendition of "I didn't inhale:" wow, look, you're just lying to my face like I'm stupid or something...
Now that I have more experience with this sort of thing, especially due to my particular kind of work, I have come to a different understanding. Oh, I don't doubt that some people just say this to allude to some kind of churchy practice that they feel may appease the ecclesial powers that be (actual or perceived), I do feel that there is a great bit of truth underlying this statement.

For one thing we are actually spritual beings. So, these spiritual, non-religious people are wholly correct in recognizing this. Furthermore, there is growing disillusion among later generations when it comes to religious institutions. A disconnect has been growing between church and, in particular, younger people. From what I am hearing and reading, people want something tangible, something that can be felt, something that lets them know that God is present to the world. They want this experience to happen directly to them and not through the institution. They want an experience of the divine. Who could deny them this? While I represent the institutional church, I do not cling to it for its own sake. For me it is a tool to my experience, identity and vocation in God. It is the means, not the end. The end is always God, and things that start to get in the way of this should probably be re-evaluated or risk becoming idols. Church is who we are as the body of Christ, not our doctrine, not our buildings, not our hymns even. It is in the experience of being in communion with each other, in a relationship to both God and or fellow diciples that we come together to be Church. And it is in this context that our spiritual natures have full expression and meaning. Thus, I think it is fair to say that "I'm spiritual and not religious."

So, this is why I can't join this particular Facebook group (sorry Rick). Just as I preach that humans must engage with the bible dynamically, I must do the same with the idea of church (lest I be a hypocrite). Not that I'm throwing away 2000 years of hard work and tradition. In fact, many of these things I want to see maintained and re-adapted to the contemporary context. But I don't want us to get stuck in a hard-nose understanding of how church has to be done. Because if the world around us is changing and we refuse to pay attention then we all might as well be inhaling.

Bible Study is starting

2007-12-15T21:05:00.001-05:00

Ok, so I have a bible study beginning--very fabulous--and I want to basically use this time with people to reintroduce the bible to them. I want to hear (if they wish to share) everybody's understanding/experience with the bible. We all pretty much have one, even if it isn't much. I am curious because people have many different ideas about what the bible is and what it should be. For some, their experience of the Scriptures has been fabulous, life-changing and powerful. For others, this book has been nothing more than a weapon to discriminate against those who might be different. Remember that movie, Saved? Well, there's a scene in there when, during a heated argument, one girl throws the bible at another (who is in the process of walking away) and hits her in the back with it, all the while screaming about the love of Jesus. Yeah, for some, it's kinda like that. Fortunately, most of us don't believe in bible-throwing.

However, what I've been running into in my conversations with people is an understanding or outside perception, that the bible exists to tell people how to live. I think most of us have had or now have this take on the good book. Hence, when they read it (if they ever do) it reads flat, like reading a phone book. This means then that engagement with the bible is one-dimensional meaning then that it is there to provide information that should go into our heads and stay there. We have to then believe what the bible tells us like we believe what we read in a social studies book. I have one thing to say about this: NO. NO NO NO NO NO NO! This is not what the bible does or is.

The bible is a story--a narrative of a people and their experience of God in the world. In being a story, the bible is then capable of engaging us as whole persons and not just our minds. It is meant to engage our minds and our emotions: our loves, our fears, our anger, or even our utter despair. This means a few things. 1) We can't read it in tiny little verses. Chopping up the bible and taking meaning from a single line of text is like taking a symphony, killing off all the musicians save for one triangle player and having her play, and only her. What's left? Nothing except that one little tinkle of sound which has been robbed of the richness of the composition that would be surrounding it if only the symphony was still around to accompany. The bible is too wonderful to be broken up this way, and far too complicated. 2) It would help to spend some time with the bible, without reading it. It may be that for some, they need to hear the bible read out loud, in its various translations so as to let the story come to life. This may mean acting out part of the story if that's what it takes. 3) The bible is authoritative, but as a story and not as a lawbook. Tricky concept, but doable.

Ok, enough for today!

San Joaquin

2007-12-11T18:45:00.000-05:00

Well, the Diocese of San Joaquin has voted to leave the Episcopal Church. Like you do. While I don't know much about this particular diocese, I've always known it was "one of those dioceses:" conservative, not so open to the women priests, and certainly not to the gays. At least, this is what I think I know about the diocese of San Joaquin--it's what I've heard. And while the recent action of said diocese appears to only confirm this perception, I still really don't know these people; given the recent decision, my likelyhood of ever getting to know them is diminished. They have opted to sever their relationship with the Episcopal Church and thus with people like me. My first reaction is to say "Fine, go. You're wrong (and nasty to boot)." But at the same time, I am sad about this. Believe it or not, I feel that we need these people to remain with us even more (not necessarily the attitude, but the people). While I strongly disagree with their action and their interpretation of Christianity, I also need them to remain with me, and hold me accountable and stretch me in my daily faith life.

I am a church planter, I have a particular openness to people who aren't comfortable with many things that the "traditional" church holds to be "true." (humor me while I abuse quotation marks) I also hold a particular understanding of faith that resonates with what these people are telling me on a day to day basis. So far, the people I have gotten involved in my ministry here often hold similar views to my own. But I don't necessarily want this, because I want to avoid my own hypocrisy. I want to be faithful, not right. I want the community i am a part of to be radically open--open in the way that answers with love the inhospility we have all experienced at some point or another. I want it to be open, not merely another exclusive place singing the same old tune, just in a different key. A community, a church, needs to be the model of reconciliation that recognizes differences yet commits to remaining one. It is easy to leave each other, the hard work is remaining in a kind of relationship (notice I am speaking of relationship in a very broad sense.) I don't think Jesus' work made him the most "correct" teacher, the smartest or the most believable. I think his work showed him to be present, showed him committing to breaking bread even with those who would betray him, In remaining linked to all people, Jesus showed us that salvation is not escape to a place like heaven, or even the "church." It is doing the hard work of staying in at-one-ment with each other. I think this might just be eternal life.

Is it Christmas yet?

2007-12-01T23:03:00.000-05:00

A friend of mine recently found a website dedicated to answering the question: Is it Christmas yet?

Bible Study/Heresy

2007-11-28T17:36:00.000-05:00

I just finished a Bishop Spong book which questions pretty much everything that could be considered a pillar of Christian faith. It was titled Why Christianity Must Change Or Die. You know, subtle. For those who don't know, Bishop John Shelby Spong is well known in Christian circles and particularly in the Episcopal Church where he served as bishop of the Diocese of Newark for many years. What makes him special is his ability to deconstruct traditional Christian understandings of oh, say, the Nicene Creed (problematic), the Trinity (doesn't exist?) or the Divinity of Christ (oh, yeah--he was a guy). Since this blog is not a book review, I'll leave it to the reader to go dig up Why Christianity Must Change for themselves. However, I will say that Spong doesn't embrace any kind of literal understanding of these things, rather he roughly reinterprets these doctrines in a manner so as to allow them to have meaning in his life. As one might guess, this approach usually doesn't fly so well with many people (think modern day heretic burning which usually involves denouncement, pouting, and dramatic exits on the part of those offended). At the same time, he argues that he is speaking to and for a large section of the population who feel and believe in the same manner as he.

So let me add myself to the pyre. I had never read a Spong book (and there are several); however, I was surprised to find that the questions he poses are very similar to the questions and assumptions I run into in my daily conversations with people (I know, bear with me, I've been in Seminary for three years...). Not only that, but I found that often I was on the same page as he was with his questioning of such doctrines as well as in his concern for those with similar perspectives. This is not to say that I hold his ideas exactly, but there is a commonality; furthermore, and more importantly, he is concerned about the faith of individuals who cannot hold the same "literal" beliefs of the traditional church but still possess a spiritual life (which is indeed an aspect of being human). His concern is that the church is not speaking to these individuals and by doing so, only works to futher marginalize itself from the world when it should be in the world, calling it into a new kind of being. I worry about this too. And certainly theology in the church has not always remained static, right? So, yeah, I like what he had to say.

Isn't this precisely what the emerging church is doing as well? Working to seek to speak to a new understanding of reality, in a new generation, that is meaningful to that community, generation, etc? In an effort to begin doing this, I'm going to be meeting with others for bible study, and meet head-on one of the most loved and contested works in the world: Holy Scripture. How does this ancient narrative speak to us today in a way that is neither dismissive nor paralyzing? I'm gonna find out...

What is the Emerging Church?????

2007-11-07T10:36:00.000-05:00

Hi everyone! Now that I have returned from the wonderful New York City, I can refocus on those looming questions that I had set aside. Much of what I have been reading over the last three months has fallen under the label (yes, it kinda is a label) of Emerging Church (I have to use something, so let me shamelessly employ this current buzzword--though I am trying not to taint it). One thing I haven't really tackled is offering all you lovely people an overview of what Emerging Church is. To remedy this, I found a nice and concise overview of what might make up an emerging church. Nanette Sawyer, who pastors Wicker Park Grace, an Emerging community in Wicker Park Chicago, posted on her blog a summary of Marcus Borg's understanding of "emerging."
This is by no means an exhaustive overview--there are many manifestations of what it means to be emergent. And this is ok, because each community, each church, has its own context--its own culture. For some people, this aspect of emerging may be threatening; I do not find it so. God is much bigger that one faith tradition, one approach. What I feel emerging does is remind us of the larger truth that is out there, but which we alone cannot fully grasp. We need each other and each other's little holds on truth in order to start approach the whole of what is actually true (of what is God). This is both humbling and empowering and for many of these communities, is uncharted territory.
Is this a different approach from the kind of church you grew up in?

Going' to NYC

2007-10-29T12:37:00.001-04:00

Well folks, I'll be off the radar for a few days while I head to the big apple to catch up with some old friends and enjoy the bright city lights. It is a kind of pause in my life right now and a chance to let my head clear and my hair down. I've been processing a lot over the last few months and I have a new question that I wonder if anyone can help me with. In my studies of the emerging church, several "names" have been given to group the various kinds of people that might be involved in a non-traditional church. From what I can remember, they are un-churched (never having been part of any Christian community or formation) de-churched (people for whom traditional church structures are no longer working) and then you have your regular church people (ok, ok, there's no such thing as a "regular" church person, I know...). While these are helpful designations, I want to add a third group that I believe I have run into that may or may not stand on its own, or be more of a sub-group of the de-churched population. For now I would call this group the nominally-churched people. People who have grown up with some kind of Christian background, but seem to lack any kind of consistant exposure to the faith. What I hear when I talk to people who fall into this sub-category is a willingness to talk about God, but difficulty in articulating an experiential sense of God, or understanding of where God might be in his or her life.
A pattern that seems to be emerging is that while there is an understanding of the existence God, and a deeply held sense of who God is to the individual, there does not seem to be a relationship there that goes beyond the thinking part (which is probably a hang-over from the modern church). There is also no sense of community either--like a sense that their relationship with God could or should have an affect on all their other relationships. Now, I don't want anyone to think that I am judging these people to be bad or lost or stupid or anything really negative like that. My question is really more along the lines of how one can bring these individuals, who are very sincerely and really quite interested in God, into a conversation where one can begin to sort through perceptions and misconceptions without leaving these individuals feeliing as if something is being taken away from them or that they are being force-fed theology. Because it seems to me to be one thing to share Christianity with someone unfamiliar with it, and quite another to chat with someone who has a little knowledge, but not enough to have, shall we say, a personal faith narrative?

I don't know exactly, but I ask these things because I want to have these important conversations with people, not be threatening, and figure out how to work into a world that, theologically speaking, is very different from the seminary world I have inhabited for the last three (nearly four) years.

Church Planting

2007-10-23T16:26:00.000-04:00

So, how does one plant a church? Ah, the million dollar question... It actually should be asked like this: "How does one tell someone about the Good News of the Kingdom of God and have it transform his or her life?" This is a contextual question, with no one way to answer it. Still, from what I have been reading, it seems that a church planter should use the simplest methods available. I've recently been reading Fr. Vincent Donovan's "Christianity Rediscovered" and his account of evangelizing the Masai people of Africa for the Roman Catholic Church. Now, I have to be honest, I've had a problem with missionary work because of its distinct ties to colonial imperialism and the utter destruction of indigenous culture and community. However, this is not the approach Fr. Vincent uses; instead he simply tells each community he visits the story of Jesus Christ in as simple and as culturally relevant terms as possible. From there he allows these people to form their own understanding of what church is by allowing their culture to inform what church looks like. Fr. Vincent allowed for an authentic response from these communities and by allowing this to happen, the Masai "got it" without loosing their way of life, their dignity or their humanity. What Fr. Vincent did was let go of all that he had come to understand as church: the priesthood, and the sacraments. He did this ot to lose these things, but to enhance them--to become more thus allowing the individuals engaging in them to also become more. What he presented them with was the essential good news of the Bible--he did not spend time trying to explain doctrine or church history, he simply told them the Story. And it was enough.

Church is not about conforming to a particular doctrine, set of values, or type of people: church is an authentic response to the presence of God among us, and the good news she has shared with us. It is experiencing tranformation, participating in it, and inviting others to share the mystery of God with us. God isn't asking us to go to church, she is asking us to BE THE CHURCH.

So, I've been running into a lot of people lately who, unlike the Masai, have had an experience of Christianity and Jesus. I would love for my non-readers to share with me their understanding of Jesus--good or bad.

Mackinac Island

2007-10-10T15:49:00.000-04:00

Recently I went to the AMEN conference on Mackinac Island which is held every other year for all the Episcopal Diocese in Michigan (and there are indeed four--count them, four of them). Here is a picture. Mind you, I'm doing this simply to practice inserting pictures in blogs--and its fun!

This is a photo of my sister and I at dinner--we had a great time and of course hit the mystery spot on our way home!

At least God didn't take two weeks off....

2007-10-08T15:32:00.000-04:00

Hello again. I seem to have gotten a little behind in my blogging. Well, (sniff) it happens. Ok, down to business: two weeks ago I visited Rob Bell's church Mars Hill in Grand Rapids, Michigan with new friends of mine Chad, Mel, and their two little girls. Chad, who pastors simple churches like the one(s) I am working to start, is familiar with this (gynormous) congregation and her ministers. After the service I met with the house church coordinator and spoke with her to see what they were doing at Mars Hill. I expected to hear about elaborate teams and a well-thought-out plan. Well, they are very organized at Mars Hill and they are indeed very organized with their house churches. The interesting thing that I discovered however, was that they appeared to be finding their house churches a little too artificial (if I heard correctly) and they were looking at new ways of creating authentic community--kinda like what I am trying to here in the Tri-Cities. Wow. I was very surprised to hear this, and pleased. I quess I felt like I was on the right path and truly some days I need to be reassured of this.

So, over the past few weeks I have become aware of a few things that I needed to clarify for myself:

1. I am indeed a church planter--I didn't see myself as such, but its high time I recognized this as the job I've been called to. I remember thinking how I could never see myself doing anything like this and now...

2. That I am not interested in bringing people to Christ. A friend of mine helped me to clarify this point which was very helpful, because while I could say this, I didn't know what to follow it with. I remember talking to another friend of mine who was saying that this is what we as ministers were called to and I remember being uncomfortable with it. Probably some of this unease comes with my evangelical background, but more of it comes from my desire to go beyond bringing people to Christ. It seems that Churches are very keen on getting people "saved," but what comes after that ? Trying to stay saved? No, coming to Christ is a process of following in his footsteps and identifying with him--it is a process of becoming Christ to others. Really, getting saved as a one time thing is easy; being saved as a long-time process is hard. It is this becoming that I want to explore in my communities--I want to know what it looks like to live as a Jesus follower in a very real and practical sense and do it in a way that brings people into a conversation so that they feel comfortable walking with us in which ever way they are comfortable.

3. I'm a sucker for cool liturgy. Actually, I just really like art and want to see it used in church more.

4. I'm still learning how to do this!!!!

Dirt

2007-09-21T17:28:00.000-04:00

I apologize to my non-readers for failing to finish up on the Kester Brewin book like I promised. What a shameful Christian I am. Well, let me sum up, but in very much my own words, what Kester was saying when he wrote about dirt. God is not to be found in the swept and kept areas of life, but in the dirt and filth of suffering--in the uncleanliness of our continual failure to love each other well. Churches are uber clean of life. I mentioned this in an earlier blog too; we have removed "church" from everyday existence and it is now, for many people, sterile. I think that this is perhaps why people come to the gritty, charming, and very alive coffee house that I now find myself in. It isn't "clean" like church. There's no vacuumed carpet, its not dusted, instead there is a beaten up wooden floor and rough, marred brick walls. It's lovely because it isn't perfectly clean, one doesn't worry about messing it up because it seems that there is a place all ready for someone to sit down and get comfortable. It feels lived in, therefore life feels present here. Churches can feel empty simply because there's no one in them most days of the week. We have huge sanctuaries dedicated to one or two services a week. The rest of the time they are silent and lonely. Maybe God gets lonely in these quiet spaces so she wanders out to see what is going on in the rest of the world--just a thought. Not only lonely, but bored. Church can feel like wandering into the part of the house your mother has set aside for guests where everything is arrainged perfectly so nothing can be touched. You get in there and look around, look at how pristine everything is, how perfectly positioned the pictures and knick-knacks are, how stain free the chairs and carpeting. You stand in the midst of this place and take in its sameness, its perfection, its silence, its rejection of your desire to live there. It says to you, "there is no place here for your play, for your rest, for you." This place must be maintained as it is, for to do otherwise would be to ruin it.
basically shit needs to happen in church. Church should not be a place where dirt cannot enter into it because as Brewin points out, if dirt can't enter, it cannot be a place where people come to be cleaned. Dirt is a part of life, life must be a part of church, therefore, dirt must be a part of church. We need to know we can enter in, settle down--get comfortable and move the furniture. We cannot consign ourselves to a God who is afraid to get dirty, to enter the darkest parts of our lives and be present there with us. If there is no dirt, there is no need for redemption, and our faith is a sham--a denial of how things really are. We must be willing to acknowledge that we are dirty, bring it with us to our faith community, to worship, and to God. When we start doing this, we can begin to know what it is to truly be clean.
I hope this was clear enough. I'm multi-tasking right now.

Gettin out and about

2007-09-19T15:28:00.000-04:00

Well, for the past week or so, I've been getting out and around the tri-cities area trying to make connections with people. This is just not easy, even without a job like mine. Last weekend I joined in the Saginaw and Bay city rowing clubs' regatta row of 13.5 miles (from Saginaw to Bay City) and it was one of the more painful things I've done in my adventuresome life. Why? I'm so glad you asked. When one rows, the hands are rubbed repeatedly over a wooden or plastic ore and this causes blisters--big puffy blisters on the palm of the hand. Also, you must sit up very straight and hold this straight-ness while you row (horrible for chronic slouchers like me). Finally your ass is moving back and forth on a sliding wooden seat that is guaranteed to numb your cheeks for hours to come. And then, when you are finished and your arms cannot possible do another thing, you have to pick up the boat and store it. Joy. Why do I do this? Well, I'm falling in love this sport--also, I meet people. It was recommended to me to do things that I like (definately good advice). So, tomorrow I will be trying to go to a yoga class in Midland and see who I can meet there. Again, this is something I think I would like even though my experience with it is very limited. If I don't make connections, I suppose I will still be incredibly fit right? :)

Yesterday I had the opportunity (which I took) to go to Northwood University and see if I could meet some students. It was Northwood's "Get Connected" day with churches and businesses coming out and putting up displays for students to visit, get info, and most importantly, get stuff. Yours truly didn't have any "stuff" other than some cookies and flyers. There was no way I was going to compete with the Mackinaw Center's Students for a Free Economy; they had an ipod they put up for a raffle. Oh, and t-shirts. To top things off, just next to them was the Evangelical Free church which has more money than God and probably holds his mortgage. They had their twenty-something group advertised and plenty of twenty-something people running the table. They too were giving something away but I couldn't see what it was. This lead me to really think about what I was trying to accomplish because I'm not entirely sure now what that is.

As far as the emerging church is concerned, I'm not sure if there is anyone doing anything like this on college campuses. I should google it, but all that I've read thus far has been off-campus. Can an emerging church even be sustained in a college setting where the community is constantly changing? I will be meeting with two students tomorrow and I am very curious to see if this model is attractive to them or if they would rather have a more traditional college ministry. Frankly, what is the difference between a college ministry and an emerging church? What does a Canterbury club look like? I know the priest in charge of the C-club at NYU was doing services and dinners--pretty much what I want to do. Which makes me jump immediately to the concept of worship in the emergent community--it can look like anything. But is it merely a difference in worship that would set us apart? What about theologically? I have a theology that is very broad, would be considered very liberal, permissive even. I see it as a theology that engages with the world where it is already and not try and make it something it probably shouldn't be (change, however, is still a essential element--obviously the world is still screwed up). Where does that place me with college students? How do I engage them theologically and challenge them without betraying my own values and expect them to be in the same place as I? Would the group even function differently than other college groups? Would we be more "out" in the world or would we function as a social group essentially? See, people tell me that their groups are aimed at bringing people to Christ. This is what I am doing as well, but I also want that relationship with Jesus to extend beyond their minds and into their bodies, their relationships, and their everyday rhythm. I know this is what other groups would claim as well, so again, how is what I am doing different? Maybe I wont' know exactly until I experience it. For now it seems good enough to say that I want Jesus to influence what they do, meaning what they create, rather than influencing what they don't do. To clarify, I want people to worry more about what God is calling them into, rather than what he is calling them out of. Even more simply, I want people to engage with a God that is more about do's than about dont's. Does this help?
I am in such a funny place today. I'm trying to find my way down a path where I have no sight, few guides and a language I've taken away from seminary that doesn't quite work in this context. I'm still being translated into this new area, this new job, this new work that I was not trained to do. So, today is a little hard for me and I woke up tired and a little down. I have to tell myself that I have only been on the job two months and that it isn't my time, but God's. That sounds so cliche that I could choke on it, but really I have no control over any of this and I find that disconcerting. Church has really gotten cliche though too. I think that's why i'm so attracted to the emerging church--because it is a surprising thing. Now, how do I tell others about it? Hmmmm.

Potter's House in Traverse City Michigan

2007-09-10T14:57:00.000-04:00

I've just returned to the Tri-Cities from Traverse City where I hung out with the fabulous congregation of Potter's House, a UCC new church plant. They are about two years old and have around fifty (ish) people who attend on a regular basis. You know, (actually, you probably don't but that's another blog) as a deacon, it is my role to SERVE the church and generally that means setting the table (altar) and reading the gospel on Sundays (besides all the service done during the rest of the week). What did I do this past Sunday? I made fondue!!!! This was a first for me--both in making the fondue and in having fondue at church (oh, also the chocolate fountain there was part of my series of fabulous firsts!) The pastor is Corey Sanderson and I met him in his book-filled office on Front Street in TC. If you've never been to Front street or Traverse City, you should check it out--especially in the fall. Lovely time of year to be on the bay and having a hot cup of coffee or tea outside. Anyway, I met Corey at his office where he was preparing for Sunday's service and realized that I shouldn't have been so concerned about dressing up for the service. I was wearing a blue t-shirt, black cardigan, and brown skirt with heels. He met me in jeans, sensible shoes (which he later pointed out to me) and a bowling shirt (which included his name)! I knew then that those days of me showing up to church in a sweatshirt and torn up jeans were not entirely over (with some, er, modification).
So, I meet Corey and get to hear his story and the story of Potter's House. For the sake of space and time, I'll bottom line it for you: relationships--they made friends, one person at a time. If there is one thing for me to take away from everything that I've read and heard, its relationships are key. Real, real, and for real relationships. The fact of the matter is, I don't want anything else either. I am new to this area--I'd like to know people. For real (as my friend Megan would say). The other thing I need to take away from all that I've learned is to be patient. This is going to take some time, like all good things. So, if you're reading this, won't you be my friend? Just kidding--that's weird and if you say 'yes' I may not talk to you for a little bit. Lately my email and phone are a vortex of darkness and worm holes sucking everything into them, but giving nothing back. So I think I'd freak out for a second if something actually did come back. Again, must be patient....

If you're ever in the TC area, check out Potter's House: Sundays at 5:30 on S. Oak.

Here's the web site: http://www.pottershouseucc.org/
I don't know how to insert links yet, so bear with me. Thanks!

Ok, next post I'll finish my thoughts on Kester Brewin's book!

Gifts according to Kester Brewin

2007-09-08T11:29:00.000-04:00

Kester Brewin, in his book "Signs of Emergence" proposes that "a conjunctive approach to faith must reevaluate the church's modes of exchange, and that central to our critique of consumerism must be the rediscovery of the transaction of gift." Wha....? Well, simply put, a gift is something that gets passed along, with nothing given for it in return--there is no exchange, a gift is not a commodity for it cannot be bought. In clarifying this for us, Brewing argues that we in our lives of faith enact that faith as a gift to the world--meaning that there is nothing we should expect in return for our work: no greater numbers, no pat on the back, no nuthin'. Because it is not about what we get out of things such as worship, but what we put into them. Let me pause here a moment to snark a bit about the "mega-church worship style" which I have always felt was more commercial than sacred. All that light and music, showmanship and special affects. It always reminded me of the circus; what do we bring to the circus? Nothing except ourselves and our desire to be entertained. At the same time, with the repetition you get in more mainline churches, there is also the same risk of "going through the motions" and not putting any more into it than one would at the non-denominational megachurch. Worship must involve the person as a participant--putting something out there without the need or expectation of getting anything back from it. Not that something won't come back, but that the outflowing of someone's being, personhood, love, is more important than what they are getting out of the experience. But something is going to come back to us. So how does one manage a kind of balance between the giving and eventual reception?
There is a way to keep gifts from becoming an exchange, Brewing points out, and that is to give the gift up to a third party so that the gift actually disappears. Gifts given back and forth are no longer gifts, but exchanges because, of course, there is the expectation that one will recieve something in exchange for his or her gift. Think about what the value of your gift is then. It is merely the value of the thing you will get in exchange. This is what commodities exchanges do for us, teaches what the value of something is in terms of money. In such a model of direct reciprocity, there is no growth, no broadening of one's view, no creativity, and fundamentally, no love. When we emphasize giving, rather than recieving, we can remove ourselves from the consumer identity our society has given us and stop valuing things one-dimensionally (dollars and cents). Instead, we open ourselves up to value things as gifts, with all the meaning and love that goes into making something a gift. It has the potential to reshape how we live and indeed how we worship. A third party, in whom the gift (as Brewin points out) disappears, keeps the gift from making its way directly back to us. This emphasis on giving makes me wonder what the difference then between worship and living would look like. Perhaps the distinction would be lessened? Possibly.
Brewing goes on to point out that gifs are terribly personal, and to allow someone to share his or her gift in the worship sphere allows that individual to worship with "integrity". And see, here is why I really like this book. Brewin's understanding of gift demands that a person have agency. By this I mean that a person can fully engage in the world as faithful Christians and can use this ability to reshape the way we live, worship, pray, and so on. When a person has his or her full ability to act, then the sky is the limit. There is no longer one way to do something, and certainly no one way to be a Christian. We all have gifts given to us, doesn't it seem appropriate that we all have a space in which to share these gifts? And not just certain kinds of gifts, but all kinds which means that we must create flexible spaces to accomodate such variety. Sounds like fun to me.

"Signs of Emergence" by Kester Brewin

2007-09-04T13:10:00.001-04:00

I just finished reading this amazing little book by Kester Brewin, a church planter who helped to found the the alternative worship group Vaux in England. Vaux is a group of artists and city lovers who use their gifts to create worship that is culturally relevant and meaningful to those in the community. After reading this book, I got the distinct impression that their worship style can be rather provocative. Good for them.
Brewin's understanding is that church has to happen on the "edge of chaos" where the rawness of life meets its own ability to self-organize and create some kind of order, meaning that the church should be formed from the bottom up, organically, naturally, without centralized power or leadership. It is a community formed out of the participation of all who are involved and it brings into that community the whole of these individuals' lives and joins them together in the body of Christ. As I read, there was one section in particular that stood out. It has to do with cities, gifts and dirt.
In regards to cities, Brewin points to the spirituality of these places, arguing that God is calling us to the cities and not from them; we are just as capable of finding God in the city as we are in 'nature.' He writes:

In building cities, human hands have taken divine materials and worked them to create new ones. Thus the very fabric of the city is testament to the cooperation between God and humanity. It is a co-creation, a partnership where God has provided the raw materials and we have worked them into fabulous architectural masterpieces full of light and space, allowing the free movement and congregation of people, exchanging ideas and technologies...soaring skycrapers cloaked in glass, brownstone apartment blocks and Manhattan townhouses, expansive docks and arching bridges...and slums and tenement blocks and concrete monstrosities and gluttonous penthouses and temples to money and mean streets. In our cities, life's rich tapestry is woven altogether, and it tells the full story of the triumphs and disasters of our urban project. We have built perfect testaments to the human situation: taking God's gifts and simultaneiously using and abusing them. Both our divine heritage and rebellious creativity are betrayed in our buildings.

This is a very long quote. Sorry all my non-readers, but for someone who came out of very rural Northern Michigian and who also lived for three years in New York City, what he has to say is astounding. For me, God was always in the trees, the sky, the earth--cities were those places that drowned out God with congestion and noise. After living in New York though, I discovered that it is true that God has not turned his back on the cities, in fact, he is there waiting for us to join in. There is so much life that happens in cities, so much beauty, so filled with ugliness as well.
I witnessed this life happening in Saginaw last Sunday night. It was a cool evening, there were soft lights illuminating the near-by narrow brick "bread-box" buildings' store fronts. People were wandering all around, there to watch Napoleon Dynamite from a parking lot along side one of these buildings. There was pizza to eat, people to meet, and life teeming all around Old Towne. This in a city that, from what I have been told, has pretty much been kicked while it was down (economically speaking)over the last several years. But here were all these people coming together in a community event; some were volunteers, there because they wanted to make a difference--because they cared about the once thriving city of Saginaw.

I want to do that too because I feel like God is already there, calling me and others to join in a kind of common life.

More on Gift and Dirt later!

Jesus in the Tri-Cities

2007-08-29T09:30:00.000-04:00

Now that I have been around and meeting people, talking to people in emergent communities and reading lots of books, it seems that now is a good time to stop and ask: "What have I learned so far?"

Hmmmm...

That while I am called to the work of evangelism, I am not an Evangelist nor evangelical. I'm an Episcopalian with a twist. :)

That because people tell me that there is nothing for younger single people and no younger single people in this area that we have an opportunity to create something for this demographic to participate in and help create. There are a lot of churches in Midland, but not everyone likes going to traditional church.

that Saginaw needs people to love her. Oh, don't misunderstand me, there are people there loving her right now, but she needs lots of love from lots of people.

That Jesus is already present here, we just need to make ourselves aware of it.

I'm searching for a new way to live, a new way to be Christian. I want it to be fun, life-giving and tangible. I want to see what my faith looks like in my own two hands as they reach out for another's.

Of course, I only have more questions too...

What is it to live everyday as a Christian in a relational, connected, non-judgmental manner? What is it to fall in love with the very things God has fallen in love with? What if we were to think about growing into ourselves rather than out of ourselves? How do we practice radical hospitality? Better yet, how do I practice radical hospitality? What am I afraid of and how do I overcome it? Where are the communities God is calling me into? Where are yours?

My New Job

2007-08-21T09:10:00.000-04:00

My name is Sarah Fossati, I'm ordained and I have the coolest job in the world. My title is Missioner to Young Adults and while this works for the diocese that hired me, I don't really like it. There's nothing inherently wrong with the title, its just that when I hear churchy words combined with words like "young" I think of church basements filled with pizza and movies while pastors/leaders try to keep pace with the "young". In short, I think of youth group--for teenagers. I'm not the only one either; many have come up to me (very kindly, with a desire to help) with the understanding that I'm going to be working among kids. But noooooo!

I'm actually going to be working with adults--that's right, people who can vote. And we're not going to be in church basements (or in churches really), we're going to be in homes, bars, cafes and nice little meeting places on campuses where everyday life happens because, really, when was the last time that you saw "everyday life" happen in the church? The closest I've seen recently is when a baby threw up on a friend of mine who was baptizing the baby--otherwise, church is pretty clean and life-free.

If you're reading this and thinking, 'Hey! I like church and plenty of life stuff happens there' then you probably hate me. That's ok, but let me finish. I'm not saying that profound and wonderful life moments don't happen in church, I'm saying that most of life has been separated from the church and most profoundly with our use of space. YOu know why the altar rail is there? Because back in the day, the priests need to keep ANIMALS away from the altar. What in the name of God were animals doing there!? Well, people kept them like people always have. Church was happening where people's lives were also happening. This isn't the case anymore. The worship area has become particular, sacred, sterile and devoid of animals, life activiies such as cooking, cleaning and even meals, which is the supreme irony because we come to church (in my church) to share at the Lord's Table.

I love church, and I get a lot out of traditional services, but I am also excited to be working with young adults to create churches that arise out of the everyday, profane realm of common life in order to bring Christianity into the everyday of someone's life and not just Sundays, or even not at all. This is my job: to be a kind of church planter among 18-30 year olds. What does a church like this look like? I'm not sure, but I can't wait to find out.

I came here looking for someone

2007-08-14T23:51:00.000-04:00

And now I have a blog.

Super